Rowing and anxious thoughts.

This is my 100th post on this blog! On with the alphabet. R is for rowing. Usually I talk about rowing a LOT because it has been taking up my life during the past 2 school years, but since it is summer, I don't think I've mentioned it at all.

Joining rowing is like learning a new language. Cox box, catching crabs, port and starboard, stroke, shell, oar, sweeping vs sculling, and the list goes on. Rowing is also like joining a cult. You get sucked in, you spend all your time with these people who become like your family, you get up at 5 a.m. against your will, you have no time for other things in your life, and you can't talk of anything else. But for some reason, I love it. I love when the water is smooth as glass in the morning, watching the blade grip the water, watching the sun rise and the world wake up. There is nothing like the feeling of a perfect set and a great row. It doesn't happen every day, but it is worth it for those moments.

I never thought I would be a college athlete. I was on the swim team in high school, and I never achieved my goal times (although compared to everyone else in my gym class who was not on the team, I was pretty good). The olympics was on in summer of 2008, before I left for university, and my best friend saw the rowing and thought it looked cool, so I went to a meeting for the club rowing team, and my obsession grew from there. It was a good way for me to get over my failures, push past my boundaries, and do things I never thought I could. I was scared because it sounded so competitive, which is definitely not something I am, but I feel like I was built for this sport.

I would love to do rowing for all four of my college years, but I am getting nervous for this year. I am mentally preparing myself for the year, when I will be sleep-deprived and I will have to keep up with my classes , no excuses, and make my own food and do the dishes, and have responsibilities and pay for things, and hopefully have some sort of job to earn money to pay for those things. And I have no idea how I am going to become an engineer in two years! I feel like I still haven't even begun, and I am halfway through! I need to try to stop living in the future, because although I can't see how thinks will work out now, I will take steps day by day, and I have to remember that even though I don't notice it, I am learning things, and new opportunities will come along when I am ready. I don't know how I still have so much faith that my life will work itself out, but I have always had that hopeful feeling, and I know God will help me through it.